


The Shackles I Wore

by Sheselectric



Series: They Won't Get Past the Gate [4]
Category: Far Cry 5
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Emotional Manipulation, F/M, Kitchen Sex, Oral Sex, Smut, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-11
Updated: 2019-08-11
Packaged: 2020-08-19 09:11:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20207287
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sheselectric/pseuds/Sheselectric
Summary: John's and Deputy's relationship gains speed until one day she disappears. He needs to deal with the fallout and reasses everything he thought he knew.





	The Shackles I Wore

**Author's Note:**

> This one is less action-heavy. We're taking a deep dive into John's head. Also, I think there are some... feelings here??? Maybe? 
> 
> As per usual: feel free to read previous installments to get the bigger picture or enjoy the one-shot for what it is. :)

At first John comes over once a week. Soon, it turns into every other day. Each time the same - Wrath invites him in and they go straight to her bedroom.

Then… _well_. Safe to say it's satisfying for his sadistic side and terrible for his addictive one.

After, they talk. More-so John talks. He’s working his angle at every opportunity, but his approach changes. He knows that as much fun as it is to push her, it simply doesn’t work.

So, he opens up. Starts telling her more and more personal things. More about the Family. More about the Father. More about the inside workings of the Project.

He understands that as overwhelmingly angry as she is, she does care for those who manage to get close. And he wants to be close and personal, the master manipulator he is. At one point, he almost thinks he has her.

And then, she’s gone.

John realizes as he comes over and there’s no-one to greet him. Her car is gone and the lights are off.

_A game_, he thinks and smirks. She wants him to chase her. _Of course_, he hasn’t indulged her like that in a long time. So, he reaches for his radio.

“_Deputy_,” he starts “you disappoint me. A game of cat and mouse _again_?”

There’s no answer. He laughs. Ah, Wrath, always keeping him up on his toes. He radios his men. If she’s out wreaking havoc in his region then someone will know something.

“Status,” he asks and when the answer comes his composure starts to crack.

There’s nothing. No assaults, no explosions, no outpost attacks. This is so much unlike Wrath he doesn’t know what to think. He gets back to his car, head full of unanswered questions as he drives off.

~

When he gets back to the ranch, he knows something's not right. He can feel it as he’s pouring himself a glass of whisky and walks into operations. When one of his men looks at him with troubled eyes, he’s absolutely sure that the information he’s about to receive will _not_ be acceptable.

“Brother John,” the man says, “we’ve got information from Faith’s region. The Sinner has crossed the border and attacked an outpost”.

John’s fingers tighten around the glass, anger building in the pit of his stomach. He smiles. It’s a terrible, insincere smile that doesn’t reach his eyes.

His operative swallows quickly. “If you want us to…”

John approaches him and places one hand on his arm. The man looks at him with fear.

“Keep me updated,” he says calmly before leaving the room.

John walks up the stairs, selling his smile to every man on duty. He greets the guards that are always stationed in his private rooms. They answer quietly as he enters the bedroom.

When the door finally close behind him, he lets go off his composure and takes a swing, his glass hitting the wall and breaking into million tiny pieces.

~

A week passes and John is slowly losing it. He tells himself that it's a test of his faith. That he _deserves_ to experience it. Then, he tells himself that she _will_ reach out to him. That she _will_ come back.

He’s sure they had _something_. He’s sure that she _wants_ to give into him.

Is that why she left? Is she afraid of his influence? Is she angry?

John doesn’t have answers and he doesn’t have a plan and it drives him mad. He tries to remember Joseph’s words.

He should let her flee. _She’s not ready_. The thing is that he’s not ready to let her go either. He fools her into believing that he set her free, but he knows that as long as she remains in his region, there’s _no_ freedom.

John’s everywhere. He sees and hears everything. He’s in perfect control over the situation. Wrath thinks she has the upper hand, but she doesn’t. She develops over the path he laid down for her.

Her leaving destroys everything he’s thought he had and that thought keeps him up at night. 

~

Three weeks pass when he gets the news. Faith is dead. At first, he thinks it’s some cruel joke, one that he could make someone pay for, but when Joseph calls him, he knows it’s real.

He calls off all the operations for the day, closing himself in the bedroom. As he tries to find the motivation for his anger, he realizes that he’s not _this_ shaken because of Faith.

Did he love her? If he did, he disliked her just as much. People of the county were making _him_ to be the worst one out of them all. The _cruel_ one. But Faith? No. Never.

She was the picture perfect of the Project. The Followers _loved _her, despite the fact that she was _worse_ than John. As these things often go, no-one but him saw that. Not even Joseph.

So, he comes to a conclusion. He’s not mad that Faith, out of all his siblings, is dead. He’s mad because the Family as a whole is endangered.

Wrath stomps over them and over everything they do, even though John’s shown her kindness and understanding he wouldn’t show to anyone else.

She _plays_ him. _Uses_ him. She knows of his vices and she pushes him to sin time and again.

Of course John would never blame himself for any of that. _No_. His intentions are good. They’re _righteous_. He opens himself to her and she crushes his trust.

“Brother John,” a voice comes from behind the door and John is freed from the constraints of his own racing thoughts.

He stands up and attempts to calm himself.

“I _said_ that I didn’t want to be _disturbed_,” he says and for a few seconds there’s silence.

“You’ll want to hear this, Sir” the voice answers and John strolls to the door, opening them with a thud.

He smiles.

“Lead the way,” he says.

They walk to the operations room and he can feel the excitement rushing through him when he sees his entrusted operative.

“The Sinner’s back, Brother,” he says and John starts to grin.

~

John can handle a lot of things.

He can deal with the expectations placed on him by Joseph. He can deal with converting the unbelievers. He can even deal with the upcoming apocalypse.

But one thing he cannot deal with is Wrath destroying his trust, and along with it, his family. He drivers to her house with every intention to kill her.

John parks outside, thinking that Wrath has some _nerve_ to just get back here as if nothing happened. He reloads his gun and puts it in the back pocket of his jeans as he gets out of the car. He walks to her door and knocks, putting on a smile.

She doesn’t keep him waiting.

“John,” she says in a dead-pan voice upon seeing him. “Come in”.

She seems different. Tired. Normally she pressures him the minute he walks through her door, but not this time. He can’t even sense her anger.

John follows her into the kitchen where she leans on the counter and takes a sip from her glass.

“You’ve been busy, _Deputy_,” he says calmly while approaching her.

She shakes her head and smiles.

“This is about Faith, isn’t it?” He doesn’t say anything. “Of course, it’s about Faith,” she continues, “I’m sorry John, but you didn’t honestly think that our… whatever that was would change anything?”

She _knows_ it’s not about Faith. Not entirely anyway. He presses her.

“_Of course_, it wouldn’t change anything,” he mocks before taking a few steps closer. “But _please_ do tell me then, why wouldn’t you kill _me_?”

She looks at him and for the first time since he met her, she doesn’t have a quick remark. 

He laughs. “Oh Deputy, I should feel _grateful._ You’ll murder my entire family, but you’ll spare me. Is this your idea of mercy?” 

“Fuck you,” she spats, “what do you want me to say? I tried, but I just,” her voice cracks, “I couldn’t do it. You _know_ I couldn’t”.

John watches her face, carefully following her every word. 

She looks right into his eyes, her voice getting harsher. “But it doesn’t mean I will stop. What your family is doing here is fucking sick, John. You must know this”.

For a brief moment he feels touched. She doesn’t tell him something he doesn’t know, but to hear it straight from her mouth… He has to remind himself that it doesn’t matter.

_It doesn’t matter_, because it’s not between the two of them anymore. It’s between her, him, and the only thing he truly cares about.

“_Well_,” he says reaching for his gun, “I don’t think I can let you continue, Deputy”.

He quickly grabs the back of her neck so she can’t move, pressing the gun into her stomach. He expects her to fight back, but instead she swallows hard and looks him in the eyes.

John looks at her and his finger grazes over the trigger. He should pull it, as he’s done countless times before.

She definitely deserves it. She _deserves_ it. _She deserves it. _

But he can’t.

She’s looking at him with such understanding, he just _can’t_ do it. It’s like that situation from the river all over again, but this time she’s ready to die and he’s the one who can’t pull the trigger.

As he fights with himself to fucking push further because that’s the right thing to do, he realizes that maybe it wasn’t Wrath who was being fooled. Maybe he was fooling _himself_ into thinking that this whole thing was only about atonement.

She slowly puts her hand on the gun and his hand twitches. He can’t give up, not yet. He can still finish this.

“John,” she says quietly and he closes his eyes. He can’t look at her. She messes with his head. She pushes him away from his family. “Let go,” she says.

John's finger hovers over the trigger, but when her other hand rests on top of his, he loosens the grip.

He’s a failure. An utter failure of a man that can’t see it through. That can’t handle something that needs to be done.

He deserves the punishment and hopes that, despite everything, Wrath will deliver when she takes the gun from his hands. But instead of aiming it back at him, she drops it to the floor and kicks it away.

John opens his eyes. Wrath takes his face in her hands and then slides them down his neck. She hugs into him tightly and he doesn’t know what to do with his hands.

His head is telling him it’s a ploy, but his instincts make his arms reach out and wrap around her.

“This is fucked up,” she whispers into his ear. “It won’t end well, John”.

He wants to agree with her, but he can’t. She’s showing him kindness and understanding that he hasn’t felt in a long time and he can’t admit that either, but it stirs something in him.

He’s not a changed man. He still yearns for dominance and pain, but when she wraps tightly around his neck like this, he knows he’s missed _her_.

In this moment, he allows himself to act on those emotions as he takes her face in his hands and kisses her. And it’s not supposed to prove anything. It’s not about showing her his place or hoping she’ll show him his.

It’s pure longing and desire as his tongue enters her mouth and his hands tangle in her hair. Wrath presses her body into his, pulling his face closer, and he grunts when her hands rest on his back.

John’s getting hard as their kiss becomes more frantic and he leans down, sliding his hands to her thighs and lifting her to sit on the counter. She instantly wraps her legs around him, her center rubbing on his cock.

He places one hand on the counter and the other on the back of her head, tilting it back and kissing feverishly down her neck. She moans when he licks the skin all the way back up to her mouth.

John moves his hand to her waist, pulling her to the edge, and pressing himself between her legs.

She reaches for the button of his trousers, tampering with it, as he kisses her jaw and then her ear. Wrath trembles when he licks the lobe.

“Tell me you’ve missed me,” he whispers hoarsely because he _needs_ to hear it.

He needs the assurance she feels as he does.

“I’ve missed you,” she answers quickly while pulling on his zipper.

He tugs on her trousers, slowly kissing her ear.

“Tell me again,” he says and she catches his face in his hands, forcing John to look at her.

“I’ve missed you,” she says seriously, looking into his eyes.

He believes her, lifting her ass off the counter to slide her trousers and panties down her thighs. She catches on his boxers, freeing his cock and her hand gets stuck between them when he thrusts into her.

She gasps loudly, nails digging into sensitive skin of his thigh. He grunts when he starts moving. Wrath wraps her arms around him, scratching on his back, pressing her body into his.

John slams into her and stays there for a few seconds, looking in her eyes before retracting to do it all over again. When he does, she whimpers and moans, holding him in place with her thighs.

He prides himself on control, but it’s slipping away as she kisses his neck and chest, her hands travelling up and down his back. He closes his eyes in pleasure and his rhythm becomes unsteady.

She’s hot, and tight, and so wet, and she’s all _his_ now. She’s not playing games. She enjoys it as much as him.

His emotions bleed into their physicality and he comes harder and faster than he usually does. But he knows Wrath is not done. She's breathing heavily when he fills her, her legs pressing into his.

John pulls her into a sloppy, wet kiss that lingers as he tries to compose himself. Finally, he slides out and she opens her mouth to say something when he pulls her down the counter.

“Turn around,” he says harshly and she does without objection.

He gets on his knees and spread her thighs, strong hands holding her in place.

“John,” she starts to say, but words get stuck in her throat when he starts licking her cunt.

Her body gets rigid before relaxing under his touch. He can hear a quickly breathed out _fuck _as his tongue laps on her and his fingers dig into her skin.

He doesn’t care that he can feel the taste of his own cum as he’s eating her. If he wasn’t so spent, he’d get rock hard again. It’s a primal, nasty feeling that makes him hum as he spreads her, so his tongue can enter her.

Wrath’s close to coming, worked after he fucked her, and she moans loud, her hips grinding and her cunt sliding on his tongue.

John wants her to go as long as she needs to because, for the first time, the _only_ thing he cares about is pleasing her. There are is no ulterior motive, no personal stake, and no attempt at atonement. It’s just a raw feeling.

He gets lost in it as he licks, and kisses, and tugs on her, and before long, she starts clenching on him. He holds her when she’s coming, his tongue still working up and down.

John lets her bask in the afterglow as he stands up and buttons his trousers. He washes his face and beard in the kitchen sink, looking at her face stuck to the cold surface of the counter. Wrath finally lifts her upper body, attempting to dress herself.

He continues to watch, his fixation on her becoming more pronounced. Now, he's caught between needing to do right by what he believes in and needing to do right by _her_.

“This is really fucking creepy John,” Wrath says but there’s a small smile on her face. “Stop staring at me”.

He returns the smile, but he has nothing to say in his defense. She rolls her eyes.

“I don’t know about you, but I need a shower,” she says and starts walking to the bathroom. It seems that she’s thinking of something as her steps get slower until she stops altogether. “Feel free to join,” she says turning in his direction, “if you… want to. Or something”.

She quickly turns back around, whispering _fuck _under her breath before going into the bathroom.

Wrath’s never extended such an invitation before and John knows that something’s shifted in her as well. He smiles to himself before following into her footsteps.

**Author's Note:**

> Just in case: I wasn't bashing Faith. I love all of the FC5 characters. I just remembered that when you're escaping John's bunker, he says that people should be happy they're stuck with him because they'd have it way worse with Faith. I thought that it was a thought worth developing, especially since it fits my narrative.


End file.
